At least buy me dinner first (Little steps)

It takes a lot of courage and self persuasion to fight against anxiety and depression.

There's of course a difference, even though one us rarely seen without the other.

Depression makes me feel drained from energy and when worst even a toilet visit seems as an impossible task. 

Then add to that anxiety,  which can scare you out if your mind and prevent you from going outside. 

Added together you have a body and a mind who refuses to coorporate - so you can only imagine the kind of fight, "the farmer" has been through. I feel it on my own body and mind, and fortunately I have my friend as a "pioneer", who walked this road alone. THAT inspires me.

Success or not is too early for me to say. But I'm not willing to live like that, so inspired by my friend and armed with desire to live as free from mental problems as possible - I chose the fight.

Each day I do myself a favour:
Get up and take a bath, feel the warm water comfort you.
Get dressed in normal clothes and get out there and fight it, if you in any way can.

Take little steps. Remember you have to start your fight, in the place, you are.
If you are scared to get outside, then just focus on that.
If you can get out but can't shop, then do that... You get the picture.

But buy me dinner first!
The most important thing though:
I don't believe you should force yourself to the extreme. If you feel pressured to get out, this will not work, then it's not training but torture.

On the other hand, the only way to get out of this place is to learn, that "nothing bad happens, when you go out." So you must take this fight, and at the same time make sure you are not breaking yourself from the pressure. It's difficult, but you'll quickly learn, when to stop.

I couldn't start this "exercise", when I first thought about it.
I skyped the farmer, who was sitting on a ladder reading a book, while training her fear of hights. (I'm still laughing with the very thought of it)

"You can't start. Mmm: you are afraid to fail."
I agreed.
"Skype me in an hour and tell me, what happens, if you fail."

I wondered about that. It's not the end of the world, I won't die...
The hour was up.

"If I fail, I end up right where I started. I might have to realize, that I will never get better," I said.
"That's true," she said. "Neither of us might ever get better... But doing nothing won't change a bit. I think you are afraid to fail,  cause if you do, you'll equal that as fact that you won't get better."
"Actually you're right. I don't want to know."
She laughed in her loving way, "so the place you are in right now is SO appealing, that you'll let the disease take control of the rest if your life, rather than try to fight it and find tools to make your days better?"

Darn she always hit it spot on!

Well I guess the answer to her was; no, I guess not. Cause now I'm fighting each day. Yes I have bad days, but I also have great days.

So when you can, grab your weapon and fight.

Look at it as an experiment.
If you are scared to leave the house, try to research when in the action you get scared? Where? Can you find the trigger? Is it I your thoughts? What was you doing? Unlocking the door? Touching the handle? Is there a certain smell?

When you find the point, when your reactions start, you stay there for a while.

Then you go a little bit further next time.
Take your time, don't force yourself, there's no deadline.