Depressing rainy days with panic attacks

I know, it's the season changing, and it seems that I manage to "forget" that each year. Everything is wet, cold, windy, rainy and grey, and it affects my mood big time. SAD, seasonal effective disorder is normal in my country, and when you are depressed upf front, the season changes definately not help. I've tried to get up, but doesn't really succeed. It's like I don't put my heart into fighting this right now. I wonder why. I feel tired....

Read More

I'm on a break from the world - dissociation

I discovered, I have a habit of escaping into a fantasy world, when the real world seems to hard to handle. I am not totally disassociated, I'm well aware that the world I escape into is not real. But dissociation gives me the break from the true world, that I need. And as always, I find a "magic world" or similar, to escape into. Anything but the real world will do! I'm eating and sleeping a lot, and I have been for some days now, so I'm...

Read More

Rest and Recreation

After all the stress around the house, I noticed, that my body has started to tell me, that something is off. Or maybe I have started to listen more!!! No matter what, I have gone in RnR-mode, I rest a lot, I eat, and today I'll go thru my meds and check I've got everything on stock at home. I'm not totally down - not at all. But I can't handle a lot of plans, I don't want to promise anything to anyone, I want to try to take it easy and just...

Read More

I managed to pull thru

So time is going by, and I have lots to tell. First off, the house... The others were stressing me out, especially my BF. Things that I asked for so many times, should suddenly be brought in order. I'm happy the job is done, but a bit sad, since it was not considered important last year! Now we are selling, and it's finally a priority... However when we went out for dinner that day, I took my anxiety medication, and they apparently noticed that. After...

Read More